It's already end of the year?! O_O

Honestly, it's just my first semester of degree and things are pretty much changed a lot. And seems like during my graduation day, the past memories resurfaced again. It hurts a lot when I wanted to forget and returned again.

21 years old and quite erm, just the same ol' self but changed a bit. I don't know, but currently I can't seem to fell in love with anyone for now..... alas only my heart will give the answer.

The exams on next year, and I'm not completely sure if I can surpass this first level of my freshman year. Hopefully I'll survive for the next 4 semesters o-O

Aye captain, I'm setting to sail to 2013!

 

Social life, mental health.....

Whoa, it's already a month at Shah Alam...... But it might be a bit of culture shock (probably), since I haven't used to get along that many of people. However, it'll make me learn how to socialize with the others.

And my mental state might deteriorate if I don't control my emotions well. Plus, suppressing it really makes my head hurts a lot >.< That doesn't count on the stress yet......

Only 10 days to go.....

Less than one week left.... and welcome September!

Already more than 3 months on vacation, now its time for me to return back on studying. It's time for the higher level (degree) at Shah Alam. My brain might need time to adapt for the new environment, but yet it'll be better than in diploma years (hopefully).

And greetings to September, since the North Hemisphere will experience fall season, while South is spring~

Chocolate...... (>w<)

So, I've been trying to make some chocolate candy and cornflakes mixed with peanuts coated in chocolate for this year's Raya celebration.

The results are quite good, but the chocolate's sweetness alone is good to coat them in.

*sighs* Another influence from Chocolat no Mahou again.....

#SaveMaryam

#SaveMaryam

Alumni and reunion

What happened on last Saturday was pretty well, though not many people come to the school. Only a few of my old friends I met and I'm happy when hearing most of it are currently in degree level, and some are not finished in diploma yet. I hope everyone will graduate in time and meet once again with scrolls (^_^)/

I realized life's journey is really long until you achieve to what you want. Sometimes, I feel pain inside my heart. Neverending pain that cannot be soothed physically. What do I really wish for?

It's already past 2 months after I left college, but I felt something missing within me.

Perhaps my heart says "I'm gonna miss them." And I managed to passed my supplementary exams and my wish to graduate together with my classmates was fulfilled.

Aftermath of diploma years....

After college life, I've ever wanted to do a part-time job or something like that.......
It's like a 4 month vacation before the degree level starts. Sounds like summer vacation =.= b
 

Graduation, exam results......

Honestly....can't I at least passed the final semester? Though I have to take supplementary exams to make up for it. Hopefully I don't make the same mistake like I did in finals.

And still need ideas on the graduation dinner theme, which is retro O.O;

Ugh....need ideas for the outfit >.<

Dispel the sadness, bitter heart

The end string of my heart tells me it's time to remove all the sadness I've been going through. What wish worth for my own feelings? Everything that happened throughout my 20 years whole. Waiting to slowly destroyed by the hatred and jealousy. Despite of my feeble attempts not to get furious with anything, it ends up with welled-up anger and revenge.

It'll keep following through. Ever.

Cry Cry.....

Hey T-ARA
saeppalgan jangmicheoreom gasigateun mallo nal jjireun neo Uh Uh Uh
neon machi munsincheoreom jiuryeo halsurok gipge paeyeo Uh Uh

*Cry Cry Can’t you see the music
bulkkoccheoreom tteugeopge You’re ma boy

**Baby can`t you see that look at my eyes
seulpeume ppajin nae dununeul bwa Uh Uh
bulgeun taeyangboda deo tteugeopge
saranghaetdeon nareul ullijima Ah Ah Let’s go

***Break it! Come on Come on Yo
Make it! Come on Come on Yo
Take it! Come on Come on Come on

nan jungdokdoengeotcheoreom geuriwohago tto geuriwohae
neon machi gamokcheoreom niane nal gadwobeoryeonnabwa Uh Uh
*REPEAT **REPEAT

Uh Uh Yeah Let’s dance Deep in you’re eyes
**REPEAT

jebal nareul tteonagaji mara
doraondan ni mal mitji anha Uh Uh
bulgeun taeyangboda deo tteugeopge
saranghaetdeon nareul ullijima Ah Ah Let’s go
***REPEAT T-ARA Time to love swit!

Hey T-ARA

Like a red rose, you pierced me with thorn-like words

Uh uh uh

Like a tattoo, you carve in deeper the more I try to forget you

*Cry cry, can’t you see the music

Hot like fire, you’re ma boy

Baby can’t you see that look at my eyes

Look at my eyes that are in sorrow, uh uh

Hotter than the red sun, you loved me, don’t make me cry

Ah ah, let’s go

Break it Come on Come on Yo
Make it Come on Come on Yo
Take it Come on Come on Come on
Like an addiction, I miss and miss you again

Like a prison, you must have imprisoned me in you, uh uh

Uh Uh Yeah Let’s go
Uh Uh Yeah Let’s dance
Deep in your eyes
Baby can`t you see that look at my eyes
Look at my eyes that are in sorrow, uh uh

Hotter than the red sun, you loved me, don’t make me cry

Ah Ah, please don’t leave me

I don’t believe that you’re gonna come back, uh uh

Hotter than the red sun, you loved me, don’t make me cry
Let’s go
Break it Come on Come on Yo
Make it Come on Come on Yo
Take it Come on Come on Come on
T-ARA Time to love, shh

This song is somehow.....hit my heart deeply.

All the feelings through.....

Strangely, my mental is gone haywire for now. Even though I tried to focus on the next subject, it sucks.

Really bad. And what's more, Kagura and Agito is actually bickering to each other now.

Plus, I don't know how long I can stay sane for this. Despite of my calm, cool outer self, lays deep cluelessness and maybe spiteful tics (Ughhh.......)

Call me by that, and it's.....

Not this one.

Ichigo: W-Wait! Don't kill me! I didn't mean to say such words!

(Note: Those are just being punny, nothing less.)

d >.< b

So, only 2 papers left before I finished my diploma years. Except I'm suffering on depression that continuously affecting my feelings. Yeah, sounds like silly for some people, but I can't actually find a solution for this kind of stuff.

Life's a bit sticky when it comes to calculation (since yeah, I'm horrible with it) But, I feel like my persona kept changing by time.

Hmmmm.......

Detik-detik sebelum meninggalkan KTT a.k.a. Kolej Teknologi Timur

-FESNI (Festival Seni) dan FESKOTT(Festival Sukan Kolej Teknologi Timur) - Blue Bison ranked 1st for overall performance (oh yeah!!!) Tapi senamrobik dapat tempat ketiga ;_;
-Family Day AS120 (tomorrow)
-Final Examination (hopefully no extending)

All the sweet and bitter memories for 6 semesters does give me a lot of meaning in my college life. And next step is degree level!

Final examination....... Dx

ETR 300 - Fundamentals of Entrepreneurship (14/3/2012)
BIO 320 - Introduction to Biological Diversity (17/3/2012)
CHM 350 - Chemical Analysis (25/3/2012)
CHM 360 - Inorganic Chemistry (28/3/2012)
CHM 201 - Physical Chemistry II (29/3/2012)
MAT 238 - Foundation of Applied Mathematics (31/3/2012)

This have become my worst nightmare......at least it's better than before ;A;

Deciphering its true meaning of this picture, I'm totally being too amiable for everything, which always ended up me being hurt from the inside.

Untuk mencari sebuah kebahagiaan kadangkala kita terpaksa mengorbankan kebahagiaan diri sendiri demi untuk membuat orang lain ceria.

Mungkin itu situasi yang aku hadapi.

Silent/Sairento

It's better to lock myself rather than talking a lot. Since each time I talked, I'm just a plain jerkass. Yep, that's why I don't like to talk. Words are really hurting people. No one is going to get hurt just by plain words.

...............................................one rant per day, makes me feel much better, my dear little diary that store my happiness and sadness.

Fever.....and sore throat

Apparently, my immune system goes haywire. I got fever, cold, sore throat and phlegm at the same time. It's slowly recovering.....

Besides, I haven't contacted my dear friends yet.....

Dx

I don't know if things keeps up like this, I might go berserk and Agito lashes out, beating people mercilessly. She have no qualms if I ever got hurt too much and pretend like it never happened.

So please, don't do anything that would trigger my anger too much or she'll get mad. Really really bad.

It's pretty hopeless to settle all the work when there's no one can support me from behind....